Sex Within Marriage

God created sex for our enjoyment. Yet, He created it for much more than this. This is why God emphasizes in His Bible that it is only to be used within marriage. It is a very powerful force that God created for more than just one specific purpose. Yes, He created it for the purpose of procreation. He also created it for our enjoyment. But there is one more reason God created sex and that is to create a bond between a husband and wife.

Sex Creates a Bond

Remember, sex is not just for the purpose of procreation. It is the act that helps to bond two different people into one. There is no other act that is as powerful as sex to bind two individuals into one.

God tells us what happens in Genesis 2:24 (NKJV): “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” The Hebrew word translated “flesh” is “basar.” This word, in Hebrew, means much more than just “flesh.” It means “person.”

God telling us that something very special happens through sex. Sex turns two people into one person. Yes, you are still two individual physical beings. But, spiritually, God now sees you as only one person. This is the truth explained in Genesis 2:24. And deep down inside, you will also feel this same phenomenon. This is why jealously is such a strong emotion.

Also, remember that sex is more than just intercourse. It is the romantic magnetism that is created when a man and a woman get romantically involved. When a man and a woman are physically attracted to each other, a bond is created. Granted, at first this bond is rather weak and it can be broken without much damage.

This is why, when a couple breaks up (even if no sexual intercourse was involved) that feelings are hurt. However, in this case, the hurt can be easily healed.

But as the couple gets to know each other, the bond becomes stronger and stronger. This is why, if you do not bring God into your relationship, sexual intercourse can easily be entered into. Physical attraction is not a sin. However, keep in mind that when that attraction gets so strong that you engage in sexual intercourse, your relationship will change.

You will feel differently toward each other. A very powerful, invisible bond has been created and it will be very difficult to break. Why? It is because God created sexual intercourse for the purpose of permanently bonding two different individuals together.

Yes, sexual intercourse creates a physical bond between the man and woman, but it does much more than this. It also created an invisible spiritual bond between the two.

Sex Isn’t A Weapon

It is because of this powerful, invisible bond that some couples began to use it as a weapon. They realize how powerful an emotion it is in their partner. Thus, if they want to hurt their partner, they will use it against them.

There are many ways to “punish” your spouse and “teach them a lesson.” But the most powerful is often called “the nuclear option.” “Don’t Touch Me!”

God did not design sex to be used as a weapon. He designed it to be used for the purpose of bringing a couple closer to each other. This is one of the reasons that Ephes. 4:26 (NKJV) says: “do not let the sun go down on your wrath.” If at all possible, work out any problems between you and your spouse before you go to sleep.

Remember what I Cor. 7:5 (NKJV)says: “Do not deprive one another [sexually] except with [mutual] consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.’

In God’s eyes, sex is so sacred an act that it should always be used to bring a couple closer together and never used as a weapon against each other.

Sex Is For Sharing and Loving

I know people who do not like the commandment given in I Cor. 7:3-4, but it is a command directly to married couples and we need to heed it. I Cor. 7:3-4 (NKJV): “Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.”

The Hebrew word translated “affection” in this verse is “eunoia” which means conjugal duty. Yes, it is talking about sex.

When we are married, or bodies do not belong to us, they belong to our spouse. I know, many do not believe this, and thus, do not want to accept it. They believe this makes us a slave to our spouse. This is untrue, especially if you have established a Biblical marriage. God designed sex to enable us to fulfill our destiny as a spouse.

Remember, in God’s world, we loose our desire to just please ourselves. Instead, God wants us to concentrate on pleasing and fulfilling others. This is done in many different ways in the world. However, within marriage, God enables us to do this through something very special. Spouses share their love and desire for each other through sex. This is why I Cor. 7:3-5 is in our Bible.

Sex Is Giving Up Control Over Yourself

This is something that many, of not most, people do not want to accept. Yet, God is very specific about it.

I Cor. 7:4 (NKJV) says: “The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.”

This is God’s ideal situation for marriage. And it truly works where there is love and respect for each other in the marriage. Remember, God designed marriage in this way. According to God’s Word (our Bible), when your spouse wants to have a sexual encounter with you, you do not have the right to deny him/her that encounter.

This does not make a sexual slave out of you. Rather it gives you the opportunity to draw the two of you closer to each other. You may not feel that desire, but if your spouse does, then praise God that you have another opportunity to strengthen the bond between you.

Why Is Jealously Such a Powerful Emotion?

Sex creates a bond between a man and a woman that is so powerful that if that bond is ever broken, jealously always erupts. Why? It is because, through sex, you feel that now, that other person is a part of you. And that is exactly how God designed it.

How is the bond broken? It is broken by one of the partners establishing another bond with another partner. The innocent partner now feels that part of him/her has been torn away and it is very painful.

Why does this happen? It is simply because sex creates such a strong bond; and now each partner feels that they belong to each other and this bond should not be broken. I know, some have become so calloused to sex that casual sex is just another activity to engage in and they feel no commitment to their sexual partner at all.

However, let me warn you. If that is how you feel about sex, you will never be able to establish a close relationship with Jesus (God). If you do not believe me, read the many passages that equate sex with our relationship with God, Himself. In fact, the whole book of Hosea is about Israel becoming a harlot (prostitute) because they were worshipping false gods.


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